REIIIIII.

WHY ARE YOU SUFFOCATING PEOPLE WITH KNITWEAR AND WHY DO I LOVE IT.

there is absolutely no "fashion" in this but that makes it even better. because Rei is absolutely one of only three or four designers who have the confidence to display incredibly unique, simultaneously awe-inspiring and disturbing art that no self-respecting human being would ever wear, instead of catering to the masses to push for sales.

Let Fendi sell coats and whatnot, Rei's going to envelop her models in giant, weird, braided, knotted, padded, knitted stuff that is almost totally unlike any sweater you have ever seen and call it the Comme des Garcons Fall 2014 RTW collection. (rtw yeah right.)

Drama Queen aka Cosmo finally figured out how to wear her blue tights

In which Cosmo goes to acting class, plays games involving Morgan Freeman, meditation, and a penguin, and tears holes in the toes of her pretentious "mint-green" tights.

black shirt: mom's closet. black high-waist shorts: idk. vaguely blue tights: harajuku something or other. combat boots: madden girl. teal scarf: target. black motorcycle jacket: possibly forever 21.

Shadows

STREETLIGHTS. PEOPLEEEEE. UP AND DOWN THE BOULEVARD THERE'S SHADOWS. SEARCHIN' IN THE NIIIIIIIIIGHT.

also shadow days for high school. It took me like ten minutes to get dressed because of too much inspiration, but I was eventually pleased.


black skirt: maybe delia's. black leggings/black fishnet tights: no clue. combat boots: madden girl. lace shirt: anthropologie. irritatingly navy t-shirt: hollister. black hair ribbon: why do you care.

shall we watch me summarize a page of Eldest in five lines? yes we shall.

Eragon: MAH BACK

Saphira: R U OK MAN

Eragon: NOPE

Eragon: BUT NEWAY

ERAGON:  UR TOTZ AWESOME

Saphira: THX U 2

Eragon: *eats food*

Eragon: *loves Arya dramatically from afar, make me gag*

Oromis, Murtagh, Nasuada, Arya: *are there for vague plot reasons*

I feel very intelligent now because I summarized the entire 667-page book within those eight badly-spelled lines.

Should I watch the Anna Karenina movie? Should I not? Is this really the deepest crisis I've had all week? OH NO WAIT IT ISN'T. That was when I was trying to decide whether to buy a gorgeous leather-bound copy of Asimov's Foundation trilogy or Shada and got Shada and was disappointed and am now deeply conflicted about my ability to make appropriate decisions.

Allow me to tell you a thing about Fendi

First of all, it's the "pre-fall" 2014 collection. What? Pre-fall, you people? It's not even spring yet. Geez, relax.

It's by Karl Lagerfeld, who is amazing, and is kind of a bunch of spin-offs of tropes like wrap coats, blazers, pantsuits, etc., tweaked in a more graphic way, plus some dee-light-ful furry accessories that look like Muppets died happy.

The fur is my main problem with it, actually. How would you like it if someone decided to scalp you so that they could put your hair on a jacket?

 

Off to a good start, yes indeed. Nothing terribly outstanding, although I appreciate the patchwork-y leggings.

 The color blocking on the dress is reminding me of something but I have absolutely no clue what. The socks are stripy and fluffy and pompom-fied and wonderful and I adore them.

hang on do those have black heels did he do the black background on purpose itlookssocoolwow

 

This feels very sixties-inspired with the op art patterns, as if Bridget Riley had a mid-life crisis resulting in a sudden epiphany where angels skipped through her brain telling her to go and work for Fendi.

Also, those are some of the best-fitting pants I have ever seen.

  SUFFRAGETTE TIMES. I feel like I should be Photoshopping "Votes for Women!" across the sash. The yellow heels are kyoot.

 

 At this point it's starting to get a bit too cohesive, although I would love to steal that big white leather belt.
I can't tell what she's trying to do with that cape. Or is it a coat? "Look, I'm only wearing one sleeve of my coat! Ain't that cool? Creativity! Ambiguity! Mystery! What do you mean, how did I get this job?"

THE JACKET. THE JACKET. THE JACKET.

Leather...shiny.. blue... red... stripes... beautiful... *crawls away to weep in a corner because she is on the budget of a thirteen-year-old*

If a varsity jacket had been shoved through the bubblegum-stretching machine from Willy Wonka and then repeatedly attacked by furious ermine, it might not be totally unlike this.
The boots look like a failed DIY project.

The Christmas sweater. BUT NOT. 

Is it just me or do her arms and fingers look Photoshopped in a really creepy way? Or am I just not used to the fashion world of knitwear and blonde hoodlums?

 

 "My bag looks like I cut a piece of my coat off! THIS IS HIGH FASHION!"

Once upon a time a rabbit fell in a blue paint can. Panicked, the rabbit hopped away frantically, right over Karl Lagerfeld's herringbone coat for his pre-fall Fendi collection. Karl Lagerfeld loomed out of the darkness. Nobody ever saw the rabbit again.

(Can you imagine this face looming out of the darkness at you? *shiver*)

Okay. Nothing special, but... okay, I guess. The pattern reminds me of chess pieces.

The bag looks like a sick hedgehog, causing me to have trouble focusing on any other aspect of the outfit. My brain keeps going, "What are you doing? Why are you trying to look at the vest when a hedgehog is dying in front of your eyes? Save the hedgehog, I tell you!"

Big belt, exaggerated yellow stitches, grey herringbone, slouchy velvet leggings... I think I'm in love.

 

I just jumped out of my chair. 

WTH, Karl...WTH.

Somebody's channeling Jim Henson.

 

Verrrrrry graphic. I'm a fan of all these leather belts, and the red complements the gray quite nicely.

Great two-tone schizophrenic collar, too. Feels like Frank Lloyd Wright, although that could just be my strange brain mixing stuff up again. Is he the one with all the glass? Yes? No? Am I too lazy to look it up?

 

Does the world really need more black leather? NOPE. Not even if it's ribbed in a cool way.

 

More colorblocking! I like the way he's using outfits mainly made up of neutrals like black and gray to translate between those featuring brighter colours (look how BRITISH I am and now you can tell I'm American because I said that)

*stares*

GIVE IT. 

I am physically incapable of making any kind of coherent comment on this dress because I WANT.

Make a little girl cry with the giant fur wrap coat that's made of the skins of poor innocent helpless animals that died crying out for vengeance. That's kind.

 The gradient plus the white trim is nice though, as is the layering with the blue skirt. 

In summary, this collection is stylish but not phenomenal. The shapes are very chic, particularly the coats, and the colors transition into one another nicely. However, aside from my personal dislike of fur, I feel like the way that the pieces are mixed is unfortunately mainstream. Long coats with leggings and women's suits are both very common looks, so I think Karl may have been catering to the mass psyche a little too much here. 

There is no denying, however, that that jacket is worthy of serious applause.

I GOT LOST. BUT NOW I'M BACK.

And that's super fun, yesno?

No, I'm not supposed to be watching math vids right now what are you talking

God, I'm such a procrastinator and I'm so weird about talking to people because I spent all of sixth period reading instead of getting up and asking my friend for his computer charger because mine was out of battery and I was too scared to ask for one ugh.

Today was free dress at school. Please let me go to a high school where I can dye my hair and paint my nails and wear actual clothes and BE A REBEL. jk that's never happening because the extent of my rebellion in life is running with scissors.

Wellanywayz, I wore a red Papaya sweater, Old Navy boyfriend shirt, Madden Girl combat boots that go with everything and have epic shmepic snakeskin patterns, and Delia's grey sweatpants that I swear are made of the dreams of children and happy kittens and distilled clouds because they are SOFT. And my friends said I looked "comfortable." YES, I AM COMFORTABLE. TAKE THAT, ALL YOU HIP CHILDREN IN YOUR TIGHT JEAN SHORTS AND FRILLY SHIRTS AND INFINITY SCARVES. ok so maybe I wear infinity scarves too and that invalidates my point, but that little irrelevant detail can go shut up and get landed on by a fallen Flappy Brick with Lipstick and Sorta-Wings.

Also, I wore my red beret, which some of you may recall is named Luffy and is the love of my life, and has also spawned some very interesting discussions. Public school has Team Edward and Team Jacob? We have Team Beret and Team Fedora. Sadly I LOST MY FEDORA. Spirit of Young Women's Conferences, what did you do.

I saw a cute outfit at that conference, actually, a little floral white dress with a leather jacket, pushed-down gray socks and Doc Martens. I think I could replicate it with my white lace dress, black motorcycle jacket and gold Docs, but I have no decent socks, only little ankle socks with supposedly catchy slogans that are trying to be like their big ribbed grown-up siblings, but are too young to be looking for that kind of fun to quote ABBA.

I sometimes observe some very nice outfits at school on free dress days. I espied a great white shirt with an Aztec-patterned woven pocket, a beige chiffon shirt with little grey kitties, and a lot of T-shirts worn with patterned flannel shirts, which was kind of cute, but no skirts because no one at my school has any idea how to wear any bottoms except skinny jeans. except for this one girl who is probably a Satanist who else would wear black lace shorts that look like lingerie to a highly gifted twenty-thousand-dollar private school?

Speaking of, I feel bad for the inhabitants of perdition sometimes. I imagine if they were as horrendous as humanity can be, the world would be quite a lot worse than it actually is. Yet nevertheless they are the ones who get the bad rap, even though we humans come up with these bizarre sickening acts that can't be blamed on anybody but their perpetrators.

DON'T WORRY DEMONS. I LOVE YOU. COME GIVE ME HUGS.

I'm bored.

I have a sudden urge to draw a mobile of unicorns to hang in my bedroom. Is something wrong with me?

Jason, bless his odd little soul, has officially dubbed me his BFGFE, or Best Friend who is a Girl Forever and Ever. The title has resulted in numerous high-fives, remarks that we are "totally in sync" and "on the same wavelength", a secret handshake that consists of strange finger-snapping motions, and fits of hyena-like laughter.

Today I had the ISEE with an epically uninterested proctor who had the biggest cup of iced tea I've ever seen in my life. It was okay, I guess... aside from Quantitative Reasoning. (FYI, I panicked.) Also, I got to the second game of my soccer tournament, which was fun until someone punched me in the back. I do not like that. Anyone who hits me will pay. But we won the tournament, so yay. 

My Day in Quotes, Episode 2

"Very skill. Much good. So Nick. Wow."
-Me, upon observing my classmate Nick's astounding failure to kick a ball

Me: "I ship Amazon with Google!"
Jason: "Googazon! Or Amazoogle! Amazoogle. That's it!"
Me: "Amazoogle 5 ever!"
-Me and my friend Jason after my history teacher went off on some tangent about Amazon, Google and international shipping

Me: "I hate it!"
Dad: "What?"
Me: "Everything!"
-When I had an emotional moment due to the utter boredom that is school

Cooper: "I'm entitled to my own opinions."
Me: "Yeah, it's just that they're wrong."
-Me and my friend Cooper after he decided to insist that Frozen was a terrible movie

I am extREMEly disappointed.

Remember how I said I like math?

Yeah, clearly this system of teaching is not working for me. Well, either that or I was way too focused on winter break to pay attention to math, because I got a 78% on my last math test before winter break and am ashamed of myself.

Bugger graphing. Bugger quadratic equations. Bugger lack of calculation ability.

Chesh's Handy-Dandy List of Mathematical Goals for the New Year
1. Remember to finish homework packets, no matter how much you loathe them.
1a. Even if it's called homework, you are allowed to do it in the car. (laugh at my joke I am funny)
2. Now that we've taken the quadratic train out of Reviewtown, you must study for longer than approximately two hours plus class time.
2a. However you think is best. Only you know how you learn.
3. Improve your horrendous graphing.
3a. Or don't and pray that there will be no more graphing questions.
4. Don't beat yourself up about one bad grade. There are a billion other grading points in math and if you keep up in all of those it shouldn't matter.

...I hope.

I just noticed it's time to go to chorus, the most boring class ever. Sigh. Ah well, what are you gonna do?

My Day in Quotes, Episode 1

"You need to draw your marijuana leaves better. They look like little Christmas trees!"
-My history teacher, to a classmate

"This is my Triangle Sally* impression!"
-A friend, while dancing and playing an invisible triangle

*It's a series of SNL skits that's actually really funny when there's no reason it should be.

"My mother married a hand model, so that she could have me and I would have perfect hands to make perfect pretzels! ... I think I would have a ring-themed ceremony since the most important thing in the ceremony is the ring that would go on my perfect hand! You know, ring-shaped centerpieces, giant posters of my hand everywhere..."
-One of the Yale Exit Players* at a school assembly

*Sorry for the asterisks. I like them. The Yale Exit Players are Yale's oldest improv theatre group - the name Exit stands for Experimental Improvisational Theater, I believe. They're fantastic. Sadly, I was forced to miss their improv workshop afterward because of a math project I could've done in my sleep. Sighhhh.

ISEE. So much fun.

It would have been bad enough if I hadn't taken the SATs about a year ago, rendering this far more tiresome than it would have been anyway and, incidentally, making me leery of all and any standardized testing.

Growl. Snarl. Devour.

I can't stand math this year, while we're at it. I don't mind math itself, but the amount of busywork in our class is maddening. The, quote unquote, real-world problems are the worst bit. Wake up, Pearson: no one cares about quadratically calculating how far a frog can jump.

And next year I'll have midterms and finals for the first time ever, probably resulting in just as much busywork as I've had so far this year.

Let's see who I can blame for this.

Me, Myself and Hi.

Isn't my title clever? I thought so.

Hey, anyway. You can call me Cheshire, until I dub you worthy of knowing my true name. I'm basically new here, although I've tried to make blogs before and they've failed. Hopefully this endeavour will turn out far better. I've got high hopes.

 I'm a scribbler and a doodler with a really good memory for interesting factoids. I just turned thirteen, so this blog marks the start of teenhood (if that's a word)... and the New Year, come to think of it. I'm also interested in a whole lot of varied subjects, which include animals (specifically birds and cats, I know, it's a bit ironic), quantum physics, books, books, books, books, books, and tasty food. I'm not super-interested in fashion, but I like to look nice, and frightening clothes bother me. Actually, a whole lot of things bother me, so expect a lot of rants in future.

Comments are welcome - I always like to hear about what I can improve, although if you cross the line, be warned.

I'll be posting photos, doodles, snippets of poems and books, and random life happenings, all served with a sauce of snarky wit and fries. No, forget the fries. I can't afford 'em.

But seriously, I'm just getting started and I appreciate help and support.

-Chesh